


Vampires 101

by nagi_schwarz



Series: Paint The Sky With Stars [13]
Category: Night World - Fandom, Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Alternate Universe - Shapeshifters, Alternate Universe - Vampire, Alternate Universe - Witches, Crossover, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-04
Updated: 2016-06-04
Packaged: 2018-07-12 04:00:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7084801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nagi_schwarz/pseuds/nagi_schwarz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for the comment_fic prompt: "Any vampire fandom, any, five times vampires adhered to the vampire mythology and one time they didn't."</p><p>John Sheppard, half-lamia.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Vampires 101

**1.** "Can I come in?" John stood just outside of Evan's quarters, one hand raised to initiate the lock. Evan had set his door so only expedition members above him in the command structure could open his door.  
  
Evan looked him up and down and said, quietly, "No, sir."  
  
John, who'd taken a step forward, froze like he'd hit a brick wall. "Right. Sorry. Just - we'll talk later."  
  
"In the morning, sir. When I'm back on duty."  
  
John nodded and turned and walked away. Vampires were allowed in without permission, Evan knew that, but John was a person, and his mother, lamia though she might have been, had raised him with manners.

  
**2.** "Sorry," John said apologetically to Jeannie. "I can't. Garlic."  
  
Her eyes went round. "Oh. Oh! I didn't even think. Is the smell offending you? I just - oh dear. Mer, why didn't you tell me?"  
  
"I don't mind the smell," John said. "I just, you know, can't."  
  
Jeannie looked panicked. "I'm so sorry, John. Is there anything you _can_ eat? Should I, uh, call a blood bank?"  
  
"No, really, it's fine. I can eat the bread and the salad," John said.  
  
"If you're sure."  
  
"Positive."  
  
"I'll remember for the next meal," Jeannie said.  
  
"It's okay. As long as there's no citrus for Rodney, we're good. Apparently there's no Pegasus equivalent of garlic." John smiled his most charming smile, and Rodney kicked him in the ankle. Of course John would find a way to get out of eating any of the tofu.  
  


**3.** "I can't go in there," John said in a low voice.  
  
"Why? It's just a church," Rodney said. As soon as the words came out of his mouth, he realized. "Oh. Um." John had been pretty open and honest about what it meant to be a vampire, but Rodney, who'd never put much stock in them, didn't know much vampire mythology off-hand, so hadn't thought to question whether all of the things he'd learned on _Buffy the Vampire Slayer_ were true.  
  
Evan, wearing his dress service blues, was filing into the church with Carson and Teldy. Why were shapeshifters immune to churches?  
  
And Rodney realized it wasn't a vampire thing at all. It was a John thing. John couldn't stand to go to one more funeral, not today.  
  
So Rodney said, "All right. Let's just take a walk around the lawns till the others are done."  
  
John nodded tightly. Said, "Thanks."  
  


**4.** "Nope, not moving." John lay back and closed his eyes. _War and Peace_ was open on his chest, but he hadn't made much headway on it.  
  
"Come on, John. We're just going across the river." Rodney was finally joining Carson on a fishing expedition. Evan, who'd been fishing before, had assured Rodney that as long as he brought something to do while he waited for a fish to bite, it wouldn't be boring, just relaxing.  
  
"Yup, across the river. Vampires can't cross running water. I'm going to stay right here."  
  
"That's bollocks," Carson said.  
  
Evan said, "Let him be boring. I want some fish!"  
  
"You can catch fish with your bare hands, which is just unfair," Rodney said.  
  
"I want to teach Ronon how to fish in True Form," Evan said.  
  
Ronon grinned.  
  
"All right, let's go," Carson said. "Colonel Boring can stay right where he is."  
  
"Don't get sunburned," Evan called over his shoulder.  
  
The men departed, and John napped.

  
**5.** "A pencil," John said.  
  
Rodney blinked at him. "What?"  
  
"A pencil in the right place would do it," John said. "You don't need a massive wooden stake. If you wanted to kill me."  
  
Rodney remembered in the gate room, with the Iratus bug, one of the marines threatening John with a pencil.  
  
"That part is true," John said. "Wood kills us. And fire. We're not as invulnerable as you think."  
  
"Why are you telling me this?"  
  
"If I ever become the monster I've always been afraid of being, I need you to stop me."  
  
"John -"  
  
John pressed a pencil into Rodney's hands, kissed him, and walked away.

 

 **6.** "You know what I miss?" John asked.  
  
"What, sir?" asked Coughlin.  
  
"The sun." John closed his eyes, tipped his head back, and dreamed. "Nice, warm, golden sun."  
  
"How come you don't turn into ash in the sun, sir?" Walker asked.  
  
"Because that piece of lore is bullshit," John said. "We can walk around in the sun all we want. We're weaker during the day, it's true. Well, most vampires are. I operate in human mode, you know."  
  
"Are shifters weaker in the sun?" Reed asked.  
  
"No. Just extra-strong in the light of the full moon."  
  
"Good," Billick said, "because here comes Ronon now."  
  
There was a roar and a crash and the cell door toppled over under the weight of a massive gold-and-rosette jaguar. Ronon grinned at them, baring his teeth, then turned and trotted away, tail swishing triumphantly.  
  
"Let's go get you some of that sunlight, sir," Walker said, and dashed out of the cell.


End file.
